Perusing the packaging of Adam & Eve’s Tingle Tip Waterproof Vibe left me slightly stumped. Not only were the tapered 9 inches of purple pleasure-provider less than plump, but it purported to stimulate “you special secret spot.” Now, I love the written word almost as much as I love sex, but what’s up with the assonant ambiguity? Couldn’t they have been more clear on their claim of g-spot concentration? And why the poor grammar?
Setting aside my spelling sensitivities, I slipped the vibe into my hand and smelled it. (Strange, I know, but it’s a habit made necessary after having a roommate who liked to “borrow” even my most intimate of intimates.) I’m used to the sweat of silicone on new merch, but what I found was a slick that smelled liked someone had smoked pot and rubbed the roach around the vibe’s entire nubbed surface.
Lucky for me, the odor didn’t gross me out. Instead, it took me back to the seedy basement parties of my teenage-hood, full of fun times, phalluses, and pheromones. My imagination flush with fantastic memories, I took two AA batteries from my nightstand (which weren’t included), toweled off the toy, and went to town.
The flexibility of the vibrator was awesome for reaching a girl’s number one “hard to reach spot”, but I kept getting distracted by the protrusion which held the hang cord an inch from the base. Not only did the edge of this bump feel unexpectedly hard and sharp as it entered my hole, but the annoyance it caused distracted me from finding my g-spot.
G-spot stimulation is, after all, is the name of the game when it comes to this particular vibe. Built to concentrate quakes from its tip to that hard-to-find corner, its shape and limberness definitely assisted in locating my g-spot. Once found, however, traditional use of the vibe didn’t have the goods to finish me off. Too tiny to focus on the full area of my g-spot, the tapered tip made me feverish but was ultimately futile.
Unwilling to accept the device’s futility - and thisclose to cumming - I used the concentrated oomph of the tip on my clit while hugging the rest of the vibe around the curve of my slit. This definitely did the trick.
After having seized in self-indulgence for some time, it then dawned on me that the assonant ambiguity of the vibe’s claim might have been intentional - and that’s when I decided to try anal penetration with the vibe.
The tapering of the vibe made it easy for even an anal novice like myself to purge of her inhibitions - and man, was it worth it! The knob at the vibe’s base made it easy to control the vibe’s intensity - regardless of what angle it was being used in. And the concentration of quakes from its tip felt divine as it was lunged deeper into my backside.
I only have two criticisms for this vibe: that it wasn’t exactly “whisper quiet” (as advertised on the package), and that it has that pesky nub for a hang cord (Who needs a hang cord for their vibe, anyway?). The important thing, however, is how I felt after using it. It was as if I’d just left one of those high school parties that the vibe’s smell reminded me of: I was sexually satiated and happily high.
1 comment:
you.. what the... wow
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