Now that I'm officially and undoubtedly single, I find myself in a precarious and uncomfortable position. The past four and a half years have been consumed by relationships of the "serious" variety, and I've forgotten what it's like to not be in a serious relationship.
There are many out there who would scoff at my statement - "How about that guy you made out with at my party?" "Remember that fling you had over Spring break?" "Are you saying that sex doesn't count if it only lasted four minutes?" - but it's true. Sure, there were one-night stands, casual dates, non-sexual-but-ultimately-illuminating encounters in between the "serious relationships" - but those haven't rendered me seemingly inexperienced at being single. At this moment, I feel alien to the world of dating.
I submit to you a list of questions/situations that I find myself wondering when I'm idle. Send help immediately!
1) Men keep telling me that they haven't gotten some in a while. Is this a casual way of slipping in the fact that they want sex? Do they think it will endear me to their "cause"? Are they simply obnoxious and/or lying in an attempt get some?
2) I've gotten some strange requests for sex in the past couple of weeks: "I want you to be the last person I sleep with before I become celibate." "My girlfriend says I can have sex with one person one time with no repercussions, and I want that person to be you." "I can't stop thinking about that one time at that concert when we were going at it, and I wanna do it again." "I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for four years and I can't emotionally commit to her - I think I have to get you out of my system before I can do it." "I've always thought you were out of my league, but I know you'll be so far ahead of me by the time you get back to New York that I need to make my move now, before you don't know who I am." "I want to lose my virginity to you." etc. Did I miss something? Is this a new trend? Are people (men in particular?) resorting to story-telling to get laid? Or is this just another strange thing that's happening to me?
3)I'm 23 years old, and if I keep with my typical age projections, I should be dating people that are within the 27 - 32 age range. If I stay away from the obviously age-retarded, does that mean that I can look forward to finding more people with emotional/financial stability?
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1 comment:
1) yes
2) that's MAD funny. I don't know if its a new trend, because I haven't paid attention like that. The next time it happens to me, I'll definitely let you know.
3) It's not that you have it to look forward to.. its more like, now you're allowed to expect it. A broke 23 year old living at his moms house is forgivable because this should be his "gettin his shit together" time. But at 27 and up, you better be well into financial stability, otherwise it shows a general lack of committment and drive. As far as emotional stability... I feel that you can start expecting it too, though I can guarantee you won't find it as often as you'd hope. By that age, the man should be humbled enough by life to realize the root of his problems and make more valiant attempts to fix them. Insecurities last lifetimes, you know? It's in how they're handled that makes all the difference.
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